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25 Retirement Quotes to Begin the Next Phase of Your Life Cars are backed up for miles. What would you do if I stole a kiss? 5. William Shakespeare, Choose a work that you love and you wont have to work another day. You ll laugh or cry when you read these famous quotations about retirement. We, Your Friends and Brothers, All sorted from the best by our visitors. The police retirement gifts listed above are awesome, for sure. You can get more money, but you cannot get more time. 57. Retirement Quotes - Inspirational and Funny Retirement Sayings What do you call a snake that informs the police? A word of warning. 58 Funny Retirement Quotes to Make You Laugh Bravery, compassion, ingenuity and dedication all must combine in order for a man or woman to make a job in law enforcement a career in law enforcement. What is five times five?" "Wednesday," replies Jenkin man. Police chief: Do you have any leads or suspects for the murder case? . 54. Jean Chatzky sums it up for me: "Whether it's fly-fishing, taking your camper to the Everglades, or just traveling, everyone has got a little retirement dream. Funny Police Quotes - Etsy The officer looked at the mirror, handed it back and said, OK, you can go. Unemployed and Loving It. ), or just manually add the email addresses you'd like to keep in your contact list. Goodbye Tension - Hello Pension! But I am happy you get to retire You always did inspire! Sherriff, I always likened retirement to falling off a cliff, and then you have to kind of brush yourself off. Congratulations on your well-earned retirement. Mark Twain, A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams. The information presented is based on objective analysis, but it may not be the same that you I said, Scissors. Honestly, sleeping in past 5:30 a.m. sounds heavenly. This highway is completely empty. Driver: Thats what Im telling you Im really far behind.. It is the beginning of the open highway. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers, A truck driver was driving along on the freeway and noticed a sign that read: Low Bridge Ahead. Chi Chi Rodriguez, When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch. There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. 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We, the Officers of the Hartford Police 623-975-0880. Honoring Years of Dedicated Public Service, To A Retiring DHS Officer / Senior Leader. Police Retirement Quotes, Quotations & Sayings 2023 Nothing is impossible, the word itself says Im possible! We tell 'em to get a life." . All the best for an amazing retirement! Why couldnt police notify the family of the murdered baker? I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work. When caught speeding, an airman on leave tried to talk an officer out of giving him a ticket. Funny Quotes Retirement | 80 Funny Quotes Retirement professionalism has set the tone 75 Happy Retirement Wishes, Messages, & Quotes - Homemade-Gifts-Made Stephen Covey 47 Likes Police quotes Safety quotes Community quotes for the rest of the department. tags: investment , investments , money , money-issues , money-management , money-quotes , moneymaking . Retirement is not impossible, get ahead with these tips to get ready! You're no longer cuffed to a job. Happy retirement wishes! I asked a rookie what he would do if he had to arrest his mother. Sherriff, My retirement plan is to get thrown into a minimum security prison in Hawaii. Julius Sharpe, Retirement: worlds longest coffee break. Unknown, Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. I call it bliss. acted upon as a complete financial plan. How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? Unknown, "There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." Before you spend, earn. Now that leadership is gone. I wish i can also retire right now so that i don t need to call anyone boss. They say, Speed Limit 65.'. 25 Incredibly Creative Police Retirement Gifts "I'm the police, and I'm here to arrest you. The police are trying to say I assaulted a guy with a sheet of sandpaper. Author Unknown, To find joy in work is to discover the fountain of youth. Pearl S. Buck, Dont think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. Funny Retirement Card For Men and Women, Retirement Cards For Him Or Her, Single Large 5.5 x 8.5 Happy Retirement Cards For Women, Large Retirement Card For Coworker - Karto - You've Worked 32 $849 FREE delivery Wed, Feb 15 on $25 of items shipped by Amazon Retirement! An officer pulls over a man for speeding. There you will remain for the last of your days, alone and carrying the Law.". 53 Funny Retirement Quotes - Best Wishes and Quotes.com Tips On How To Save For Retirement Without A 401k, Best Places To Retire In Arizona 2020 | Retirement Communities, Memory Care Checklist: What To Ask & Look For, What is Memory Care? 24. Ella Harris, "When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch." They apply financial concepts in a general manner and include What happens when a police officer goes to bed? 161+ Funny Retirement Cake Sayings Will Make You Smile Best wishes in all your future endeavors. Did you hear they arrested the Energizer bunny? Amazon.com: Funny Retirement Cards We have now done so much for so long with so little, we are now capable of doing anything with nothing. 87 Best Retirement Quotes: Including Funny, Short and Inspirational If a robber robs a house under renovation and accidentally leaves his handprint on wet cement. I did not write the law. As one chapter ends, another begins, welcome to your new . I'm Retired. If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. A police officer just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes. We tell em to get a life. Vince Lombardi, In retirement, every day is Boss Day and every day is Employee Appreciation Day. Unknown, Working people have a lot of bad habits, but the worst of those is work. Clarence Darrow, Money is something you got to make in case you dont die. Max Asnas, I dont feel old. A cop caught a graffiti artist spraying a police station in a thick font. What does a frog use to keep away burglars? The officer cuts him off, "Sir, you were going twice the speed limit, I'm going to issue a ticket." Insistent, the man pleads, "Please! So here are some more great ideas for the boys (and girls) in blue! Funny Police Retirement Quotes, Quotations & Sayings 2023 Here it is, she said. "You will be alone. Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?, Me: You were bored and wanted some company?. It means choice." For myriad reasons, this is a sub-optimal short-term solution to what really is a long-term problem. Carolyn Leigh and Cy Coleman Jump in! To display your contact list, you must sign in: It's St. Patrick, a Perfect Time to Be Punny! 26. Police Quotes - Etsy 7. You cant win until you do this. "How did you get your answer?" "Easy," says Martin, "just subtract 191 from Wednesday." 53. 12. "When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. 6. I don't necessarily believe in physical retirement. Author Unknown, Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. Ifyou feel like theres something out there that youre supposed to be doing, it you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it. vision, and trust you instill in us! So if youre looking for inspiration, youve hit the mother lode. We've found several retirement quotes and sayings that will fit their personality. I guess he wants a rematch because hes been following me for about 45 minutes. the People of the City of New York. So increasingly will be peace. Here are 25 retirement quotes for the next phase of your life: Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. A Lifelong Friendship. Doris Day, How old would you be if you didnt know how old you was? "Here's to a well-deserved and happy retirement! It's when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it." For more information about our senior living facility, SLS Communities or to schedule a tour, please call us today at 623-544-4777. The perfect crime was committed last night. Thats ridiculous. Simone De Beauvoir, The worst of work nowadays is what happens to people when they cease to work. Capitalize on what comes. Leave the Relaxing to Her! You have always dreamed of concentrating on your own project. 25 Greatest Retirement Songs for a Party or Slideshow Oliver Wendell Holmes, The best is yet to come! Assisted Living Checklist: What To Ask & What To Look For, Quotes & Sayings For Retirement Cards 110 Quotes Continued, Retirement Party Ideas For Coworker | Canyon Winds, 30 Quotations About Getting Old - Desert Winds Retirement Community, Physical Games For Seniors - MeasurAbilities, LLC, 68 Retirement Wishes For A Boss - Canyon Winds Retirement, 65 Quotes About Getting Older | Funny & Inspirational Sayings, 55 Funny And Inspirational Quotes About Aging - Vista Winds Retirement, Motivational Fitness Quotes - Body Smith Fitness, 75 Funny Music Quotes - Amazing Mobile Music, 65 Getting Older Quotes | Chaparral Winds Retirement, Age is an issue of mind over matter. 3. Showing search results for "Police Retirement" sorted by relevance. Act like the inner young person you have always been. J.A. 10. Fred Rogers The best is yet to come! Dave Allen, "I find the biggest trouble with having nothing to do is you can't tell when you are done." All the best!". Retirement Quotes (159 quotes) - Goodreads Amazon.com: Retired Police Shirt 51. 2) Old age, fragile bones, doctor visits, medical checkups and a weak bladder - are you still looking forward to retirement? Satchel Paige, A goal without a plan is just a wish. This religious prayer and word of encouragement is a great way to honor the retiring police chief and wish him or her all the best for a happy and peaceful retirement life. Whos the most famous lawn detective? Funny retirement quotes and sayings. With Great Honor and Recognition Financial Planning Voltaire, The question isnt at what age I want to retire, its at what income. From the movie: Judge Dredd. Harry Vardon, Theres never enough time to do all the nothing you want. Something pretty thats just the surface. retirement savings in an IRA or qualified plan such as a 401(k). 6. 30. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}). Unknown, "The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender." How Much Do I Need?, Net Worth? So, I do it three or four times a day. Gene Perret, Im not just retiring from the company, Im also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. Hartman Jule, Retirement is when you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house. Unknown, Retirement, a time to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, where you want to do it, and how you want to do it. Catherine Pulsifer, Youre retired goodbye tension, hello pension. Unknwon, Retirement is wonderful. Theres a man in the town whos stealing the wheels of police cars. "Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house." -Unknown "My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law." -Jerry Seinfeld "Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. If you look at what you have in life, youll always have more. 60+ Police Jokes And Puns So Funny They're Practically Illegal There s a retired person in the premises with not a lot to do and plenty of stories to tell. For example, some Americans start a second career during retirement. R.C. Go make the most of your days and enjoy your retirement. Retirement is just a never ending vacation. Retirement GIFs - Find & Share on GIPHY Catherine Pulsifer, "Retirement: No job, no stress, no pay!" 45. Retirement caps a career and opens the door to long-anticipated plans and dreams. It is the beginning of the open highway." - Author Unknown Discover and share Police Funny Quotes About Retirement. A personalized crystal plaque engraved with a heartwarming message to the retiring law enforcement officer will mean the world to that public servant in your life. Financial peace isnt the acquisition of stuff. "When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch" R C Sherriff. Retirement's the most wonderful thing. done for this department over the years! I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Retirement Quotes | The 30 Best Inspirational & Funny Retirement Quotes May you enjoy every minute of your retirement. Sheesh, I thought you were the cop here., Perp: With my parents. Cop: Where do your parents live? Perp: With me. Cop: Where do you all live? Perp: Together. Cop: Where is your house? Perp: Next to my neighbors house. Cop: Where is your neighbors house. Perp: If I tell you, would you believe me? Cop: Tell me. Perp: Next to my house.. Jeanne Moreau, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. Julius Sharpe"There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working." Funny Retirement Quotes - Funny Quotes about Retirement to Make the Retiree Smiles. The goal is to enjoy it the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. Jonathan Clements, I have never liked working. 80+ Funny Retirement Messages, Wishes and Quotes Weve also compiled some police officer happy retirement messages and wishes if youre looking for an inscription with a little more flexibility. Personalized Crystals to Celebrate Life's Moments 2023 DIYAwards.com. Louis Armstrong, Retirement is a one-way trip to insignificance. "That's great!" says the doctor. If you give one of these to a colleague, friend, or family member that is looking forward to retirement, it will surely help you communicate your appreciation. provides you with a way to estimate your future retirement income needs and assess the impact of Give Without Remembering and If you look at what you dont have in life, youll never have enough. Unknown, Expect the best. - Unknown. The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances. George Burns, Age is an issue of mind over matter. What do you say when your friend wants to hear a really cool joke about the police from you? Why did the police arrest the star? Gene Perret, "My father calls acting 'a state of permanent retirement with short spurts of work.'" Do you have an investment policy statement? What happened? Why did the police arrest the turkey? The best part about retirement is that you don t have to worry about getting caught for doing nothing. Some call it retirement; I call it bliss. Betty Sullivan, In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. Mason Cooley, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. Andy Rooney, Work is the curse of the drinking classes. Oscar Wilde, The company gave me an aptitude test and I found out the work I was best suited for was retirement. Unknown, Sometimes its hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a punishment. Terri Guillemets, I think that retirement is the first step towards the grave. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Fred Rogers, Retirement is not in my vocabulary.