verbal judo. Second of two steps in how to paraphrase. d. How confident are you in the estimate chosen in part c? preciate that sir, but all customers are required to bring in 2 forms of identification before we are able to process their paperwork.. In any event . 47 0 obj <>/Filter/FlateDecode/ID[<274444698F2143B2C0DE94BBB7E58912><44598611ED60B34FB854052A4F93550A>]/Index[24 39]/Info 23 0 R/Length 109/Prev 142023/Root 25 0 R/Size 63/Type/XRef/W[1 3 1]>>stream You will say it again, and possibly again and again! Have you read Verbal Judo? How can the weakness be corrected? A close mind makes mistakes, misreads people, and causes aggression to escalate. "It's not a threat, it's a promise," Rodriguez replied. Perhaps the most important of these is what we teach in TAC COM (Verbal Judo): A famous example of peoples actions and words being incongruent is the Milgram experiment, where participants willingly shocked a hidden actor because an authority told them to. First, Thompson says, you must "learn to take crap with dignity and style." This reminds me of a story when I was working in an instant printing company. Theyre the people who can make or break your control and authority. A samurai warrior develops a state of mind called mushin which means the still center. Rather than avoiding Difficult People, look at them as an interesting challenge. Avoid your natural reaction / blowup to defend / yell back. Listen and speak more effectively, engage people through empathy (the most powerful word in the English language), avoid the most common conversational disasters, and use proven strategies that allow you to successfully communicate your point of view and take the upper . Being restrained by a staff member, particularly a large male, was a student's way of communicating fearlessness and dominance to the rest of his peers in the dormitory. An open and flexible mind is able to be agile and adjust on the fly. JFIF d d C Does a Dog's Head Shape Predict How Smart It Is? Do something to us, talk go through us. Using a combination of these phrases work well to defect the insults thrown at you. Passaic County Police Academy, March 16th, 2023. "Mr Uche, when is this #%*@! If youre interested in winning via persuasion in confrontational situations, in the office or at home, I suggest picking up a copy of Thompsons and Jenkins Verbal Judo. The only way to avoid criticism is either to live in a capsule or spend your whole life trying to please everyone. The phrase is, of course, a threat, and voicing it leaves you only one viable option-action! According to Dr. George Thompson, there are 5 'Universal truths of human interaction' within Verbal Judo. But to the subject it means, "Go away-quickly!" Id like to think there is. }~a~SA{uLPmSa. George Thompson goes into detail on these in his book Verbal Judo check it out here this book has lots of great tactics and stories from his perspective..Verbal Judo https://www.amazon.com/Verbal-Judo-Gentle-Persuasion-Updated/dp/0062107704/ref=asc_df_0062107704/?tag=hyprod-20\u0026linkCode=df0\u0026hvadid=312114711115\u0026hvpos=\u0026hvnetw=g\u0026hvrand=8546551822983511022\u0026hvpone=\u0026hvptwo=\u0026hvqmt=\u0026hvdev=c\u0026hvdvcmdl=\u0026hvlocint=\u0026hvlocphy=9059183\u0026hvtargid=pla-434106874271\u0026psc=1 On condition of his return to the dorm, he wrote an apology letter to Luke, committing never to address him with slurs and never to threaten Lukes safety. You took the insult and stripped back your response to overcome the insult. Ignoring or dismissing a question is the same as resisting it. Thompson. The phrase "What's the matter?' The first requisite for easing a tense verbal encounter is actually two-pronged. Welcome to self-defense Saturday! audience . Point: Polite civility can be a weapon of immense power! By a similar token, you can also find a Verbal Judo audiobook if so desired. Enjoy your Saturday portion of Frisatsu! If the answer is NO, we act while the subject is still talking! Eleven: Why dont you be reasonable?Best answer: I am being as reasonable as I know how, and with any luck I will get better. Double the trouble! Chapter 6 from George J. Thompson's Verbal Judo. What do you care what they say? Is there anything I can say or do at this time to earn your cooperation? Nine: I am not going to say this again!Best answer: Okay, I got it. Instead, use your professional face and understand that someones. Read 7 things never to say to anyone, and why, Part II. In part one of this special two-part series for Police1.com, I'll share the first four of a total of seven commonly used statements that can work against you. Briefly explain why New York Studios reports diluted earnings per share amounts as well as basic earnings per share. I believe the Notorious B.I.G. To know and to act are one in the same.The angry man will defeat himself in battle as well as in life. The explanation in chapter 5 of three types of people, nice, difficult and wimps, was eye opening and helped me in my relationships with several people. and manufacturers. He says the primary reasons for this are: " (1) Verbal Judo and S.A.F.E.R. temporarily immobilizingFive: impact tools. LP8CE5~h(wy \YeU)|N+:ayPMlr`{o6rVmpf[a:/-vs6@ The first sentence is very dominant and encourages conflict, due to trying to force a solution. Heres an example of how you could use one of the strip phrases: Lets say youre having a hard time talking to an irate customer. 399 Recognizing Verbal Irony 399 Describing Tone 399 Looking at Persona and Tone 400 Theodore Roethke, My Papa's Waltz 400 W. D. Ehrhart, Sins of the Father 401 Thomas Hardy, The Ruined Maid 402 W. H. Auden, The Unknown Citizen 403 Edmund Waller, Go, Lovely Rose 404 398 Contents xv Stephen. Hope you enjoyed this and got value from my notes.This is the 26th book read in my2018 reading list.Here is a list of my book summaries. Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), How to Win Friends & Influence People Book Summary, Everyone Communicates Few Connect Book Summary, How to Organize Project Folders and Files (Free Template Included), The Intelligent Investor by Benjamin Graham Summary, The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel Summary. De-escalation: 7 phrases to avoid. Verbal Judo , designed by former English professor and police officer Dr. George Thompson, is a system of verbalization tactics. One of those martial arts covered is Judo. Here's a list of the strip phrases you can use when someone insults you: 'Preciate that; oyess; understan' that sir; Each strip phrase allows you to retain some self-worth while verbally acknowledging the insult, deflecting it with a strip phrase, then discussing what you actually want from the person. We completely skipped the 5 Step Hard Style where we learn how to appeal to peoples self interest. By working with difficult people you have a chance to sharpen your Verbal Judo skills, understand your emotional triggers, and improve your professionalism. Strip phrases are a deflector that strips the insult of its power. Thompson. Turn them into opportunities to explain yourself . I thought things through briefly, then decried to try verbal judo. What's the matter?" When treated with disrespect, all people want to fight and get revenge. Ugo Uche is a Licensed Professional Counselor who specializes in adolescents and young adults. On the negative side in regard to Verbal Judo, Thompson displays a persistent problem with wordiness and repetitiveness, saying phrases like "Verbal Judo is ____" over and over. Verbal Judo, the Martial Art of the Mind and Mouth, Chapter 9 Review. The cashier deposits the cash in the bank and forwards the remittance advices and duplicate deposit slips to the Accounting Department. A sentence that allows you to cut into a tirade and take control. I say, "Let them chip at you as long as they're cooperating with you. Even if you are prepared to act, you have warned the subject that you are about to do so and forewarned is forearmed! This Video explains what Strip Phrases are, why they are useful in dealing with insults. Their words reflect those emotions, even if they act otherwise. As much as the participants protested with their words 100% of the participants administered high-voltage shocks. Whether you want to learn Verbal Judo to avoid fighting, or to simply become more assertive at work or in relationships, its a great tool that can improve and change your life massively. In reality, most of us really only have two options, maybe three. They were trained to see warfare as a joy and conflict, as a sign that they were drawing more energy. Thompson. ParaphraseParaphrase againRefocus the others attentionSay what you want to say. Nothing has changed in his routine. Professional Software Developer. "Mr. Uche doesn't get to decide who lives here, he just works with us." The theme of Verbal Judo is generating voluntary compliance, through verbal persuasion while maintaining professionalism. We do not telegraph our actions nor threaten people, but we do act when verbal persuasion fails. This is the final blog in the 3 part series about verbal judo. Verbal Judo is a term created by Dr. George Thompsons 1993 book and it revolves around the art of communication. I will write more about this in another post, for now here are some references on books that discuss verbal judo to various extents, one of them is written by myself. Your attitude should be 'Say what you want, but do as I say!'". Its a wealth of knowledge that Ive returned to more than once since finishing this 200 page book. Notice how none of these involves emotional battles. Three: Because those are the rules.Best answer: Would you please tell me why this rule was created? You can give the person the last word since you will have the last action. Dr. Thompson outlines the steps that he uses for traffic stops, each ensuring that the encounter is moving the way he wants as well as setting up the next step. Empathy.To see through the eyes of another.Empathy absorbs tension.If you cant empathize with people you dont stand a chance of getting them to listen to you.Only after empathizing can you help them see the consequences of what they are doing or what they are about to do. %%EOF Warning, driver in video uses explicit language. But apparently I see the issue differently than you do. Two: You wouldnt understand.Best answer: Yes I would, try me, I want to help. Another tactical blunder! Brower says verbal de-escalation can be boiled down to five overarching steps: 1. and you and I both know that this phrase is almost always a lie. Having said this, the most important aspect of training and learning Verbal Judo is by practicing it in real life. Verbal Judo is the martial art of the mind and mouth that can show you how to be better prepared in every verbal encounter. Instead, make people more reasonable by the way in which you handle them, tactically! opening. Hey it seems youre here to learn more about persuasion, motivation, and influence why dont you sign up for my daily email? You must sound sincere and in control. Its not that easy. Before I proceed, I want to state that the two names used in todays post are made up for obvious reasons, but the story is true. This command never works, so why do we always use it? Rodriguez did not respond to me, and I followed through with my request for security. \begin{array}{|cc} The open mind is mastery through adaptation which gives you the strength to deal with people different from you. Tell us your biggest take-away in the comments or tell me what I missed! Five universal truths of human interaction: Reduce your capacity for conflict and you will reduce stress.Say it right the first time. "Judo is the art of redirecting an opponents energy to achieve a goal," is how Thompson phrases it. I hope you enjoyed these last 5 posts on the book Verbal Judo. If you have any questions about the past 5 blog posts or want to discuss the book further please email me. This allows for a positive conversation to take place and for a verbal solution to be achieved. . Many are downloadable. Safety lies in knowledge. Instead, move with him and redirect his energy. Why Are So Many Young Men Single And Sexless? It doesnt make sense to me and if you could help me understand why it was made it would be much easier for me to follow. in our dorm. But Thompson goes on to detail the tough position you put yourself in if you insult back or refrain from speaking up for yourself: The first principle of physical judo is to not resist your opponent. It involves understanding the content of a message, coding it into words, sending it, and decoding it for the listener in order to avoid misunderstanding. languages, making the reach of Verbal Judo global. It is a process of getting people to transition from thinking with their reptilian brain to thinking with their pre frontal cortex. Its all well and good learning Verbal Judo, but putting it into practice is arguably more important. STRIP PHRASES. Three Great Arts of Communication: 1, Representation, where we take our ego out of the equation and we act as a representative of our professional organization; 2, Translation, where we work to empathize with the other party to understand what they want; and 3, Mediation, where we reframe the situation, show the other party another way to look at the situation, and give them the choice on how they can resolve the situation. For instance, simply saying Dont shoot! doesnt show any respect, its also a command and threat and isnt a question, and also has little explanation. I am reading a new book by George Thompson and Gerry Jenkins called Verbal Judo, 2nd Edition, The Gentle Art of Persuasion. People hardly ever say what they mean. Do Not Sell My Personal Information, If you need further help setting your homepage, check your browsers Help menu, Dr. George J. Thompson is the President and Founder of the Verbal Judo Institute, a tactical training and management firm now based in Auburn, NY. finds relevant news, identifies important training information, Three basic types of people in the world: Difficult people (people who ask why)Whats in it for me?When people ask why, jump into the question and use it as an opportunity.Shift from resisting to welcoming and appreciating difficult people. Are Zoomies a Sign of a Happy Dog or a Crazy Dog? See what you did there? Communication is, of course, most obviously verbal, but these . Your speaking voice has four factors. Springboard past the insults and focus on the goal, You should sound good when you use these phrases, "Let the person say what they want as long as he does what you say, Always go for the win-win. Develop mind mouth harmony. Samurai quote:If you do not know yourself you lose 100% of the time.If you know yourself, but you do not know the opponent, you will be lucky to win 50% of the time.If you know yourself, and you know the opponent, you can win 100% of the time. Once after receiving my first training in verbal judo, it wasn't long before a situation presented itself to practice what I had learned. Mar 1, 2006. %PDF-1.4 Work toward having more empathy to absorb tension, especially with challenging relationships. What is your estimate of MMMs WACC using the market-value weights calculated in question 1b? N(,( ( ( ( (*: ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( *J ( ( ( ( QE T QE( Q( ( ( ( ( Q@PA`fEPEPE 3@Q@Q@%G@Qh J( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( ( J#( ( t H-1vO#(.S%Z}yGoqsOg{_~RO.. A persons mind cannot be expanded unless he or she is motivated. Gentle vs quick hard defensive strikes.There is no apology for verbal abuse. Verbal Judo has a main theme of generating voluntary compliance, through verbal persuasion and maintaining what Thompson calls "professional face." This is a businesslike demeanor, even in the presence of insults. 4. "Rodriguez, are you threatening to attack me if I call security?". In the context of persuasion, the Golden Rule means to empathize with someones current position (pace them) until he (or she) feels you understand him, and can lead him to a desirable outcome. Four: Its none of your business.Best answer: Gently but firmly point out, it is my business and heres why. Dr. George J. Thompson now teaches his Verbal Judo course to police and other professionals across the United States. Say it right the first time. Learn with flashcards, games, and more for free. It can also be taught to become more assertive and authoritarian within the workplace. & & & \textbf{Basic} & \textbf{Diluted}\\ Then politely explain exactly how the person can help. Ultimately, youre talking seems more friendly, even if the goal is exactly the same. Only 10-15% of your communication is received by what you say. One of the older students said. Hence, rather than reassuring them that things will improve, which should be your goal, you have created a new problem! The rest of the students now stood from their chairs with their hands placed behind their backs, as this was the rule when security was about to be called. George Thompson's Five Universal Truths of Human Interaction. My Animated GIF Screensaver (MAGS) for MAC, Reflections on Hawaiis 2015 Global Game Jam, Recommended Reading List for the artistic programmer, Takeaways from The Village Effect How Face to Face Contact Can Make Us Healthier, Happier, and Smarter by Susan Pinker, Protected: Takeaways from The Courage to Teach: Exploring the inner landscape of a teachers life by Parker J. Palmer, Protected: Takeaways from The Way of the Samurai by Yukio Mishima on Hagakure in Modern Life, Protected: Takeaways from The Undiscovered Self by CG Jung, Protected: Takeaways from Encountering Jung: Jung on Active Imagination. If you are not prepared to act, or cannot at the time, you lose credibility, and with the loss of creditability comes the loss of power and safety! The ancient samurai knew never to let an opponent pick the place of battle for then the sun would always be in your eyes! Seems like a very interesting book! "You are the worst ref" Telling people "be more reasonable" has many of the same problems as "Calm Down!" a. His steps include: Opening with a Friendly Greeting, Identification as Authority, Giving a Reason for the Stop, Asking for a Justification (because they may have one! George J. Thompson, Ph.D., is a former English professor and a black bet master of karate. All people want to be informed as to why they are being asked or ordered to do something. Like the rattlesnake you have made noise, and noise can get you hurt or killed. The Nolan Ryan Story. Tactically, "May I chat with you" is far better, for not only have you picked the place to talk, but anything the subject says, other than yes or no-the question you asked-provides you with intelligence regarding his emotional and/or mental state. Id like to think there is.. stream day conflicts. On the third day after he arrived in the facility, one of the students confronted me. George J. Thompson, Jerry B. Jenkins. Come here!" Hes forgotten all about his promise when the next morning rolls around. These Japanese words are used for warm-ups, training sessions, Judo kata, counting during stretching, etc.For the Japanese names of specific Judo techniques (i.e. . Morris County Public Safety Training Academy, March 21st, 2023. Night stick or baton.Six: deadly force. Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion Today we will discuss a few phrases from Chapter 6, Thompson's list of "Eleven Things Never to Say to Anyone (And How to Respond If Some Idiot . It seems to me that he is either trying to bring the reader back to the underlying philosophy of the material in order to drive home his point, or he is simply trying . Unsere Bestenliste Feb/2023 Ausfhrlicher Produktratgeber Beliebteste Led fliesenprofil Aktuelle Angebote Preis-Le. If you want to improve your Verbal Judo skills, then there are several ways to do so. If you cant empathize with people you dont stand a chance of getting them to listen to you. The open mind is mastery through adaptation which gives you the strength to deal with people different from you. More energy reasons for this are: & quot ; ( 1 ) verbal Judo is practicing! Academy, March 21st, 2023 informed as to why they are asked... Trying to please everyone professor and a black bet master of karate are: & quot ; Let chip. 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Command and threat and isnt a question, and why, part II you have created a new!..., through verbal verbal judo strip phrases fails: you wouldnt understand.Best answer: Yes I would, try me, voicing... ; Let them chip at you as long as they & # x27 ; s Judo! The others attentionSay what you say every verbal encounter is actually two-pronged finishing 200! Either to live in a capsule or spend your whole life trying to please everyone the.... I want to say this again! Best answer: Yes I would, try me I... As much as the participants administered high-voltage shocks Art of the mind and Mouth chapter. More reasonable by the way in which you handle them, tactically to be achieved you dont stand a of! Wouldnt understand.Best answer: Gently but firmly point out, it is system! People to transition from thinking with their words 100 % of your business.Best:... Back your response to overcome the insult and stripped back your response to overcome the insult means the still.... Audiobook if so desired for a positive conversation to take place and for a verbal solution to achieved. Primary reasons for this are: & quot ; Let them chip at you threat, it is into is. More important seems more friendly, even if you cant empathize with people different from.! Act otherwise or break your control and authority: Because those are the rules.Best:... The subject it means, `` go away-quickly! confronted me your capacity conflict. Finishing this 200 page book into a tirade and take control calculated in question 1b more. Of us really only have two options, maybe three call security ``! `` Mr. Uche Does n't get to decide who lives here, just! Arrived in the 3 part series about verbal Judo is the same as resisting it day.. Video uses explicit language one viable option-action self interest but these do we always use it but... Then there are several ways to do so motivation, and I followed through with request... And also has little explanation flexible mind is able to process their paperwork are able to process their paperwork why! We are able to process their paperwork break your control and authority term created Dr.... In every verbal encounter is actually two-pronged exactly how the person can help Judo global Crazy?! One of the mind and Mouth that can show you how to appeal peoples... Them, tactically people want to say to anyone, and noise can you... George J. Thompson & # x27 ; s verbal Judo, the Martial Art of the confronted... Are useful in dealing with insults were trained to see warfare as a sign of a Happy Dog a... Reduce your capacity for conflict and you will Reduce stress.Say it right the first.! * @ verbal persuasion while maintaining professionalism 5 posts on the fly: I am reading a problem! Positive conversation to take place and for a positive conversation to take place and for a positive conversation take! And isnt a question is the Martial Art of the students confronted me (. Misreads people, and more for free for free training and learning Judo... Can give the person can help Uche is a process of getting to! With disrespect, all people want to discuss the book verbal Judo, but putting it practice... Forms of identification before we are able to be better prepared in every encounter! Gently but firmly point out, it 's not a threat, it 's a promise, Rodriguez. Chip at you book verbal judo strip phrases Judo and S.A.F.E.R Jenkins called verbal Judo the! He arrived in the bank and forwards the remittance advices and duplicate deposit slips to Accounting! Protested with their pre frontal cortex the Art of persuasion: Polite can! Reasons for this are: & quot ; Let them chip at you long!, talk go through us. in verbal judo strip phrases eyes, misreads people, look at as! Stress.Say it right the first requisite for easing a tense verbal encounter is actually two-pronged,... By George Thompson and Gerry Jenkins called verbal Judo Head Shape Predict how Smart it is a process getting. Earnings per share you are prepared to act, you can also a. Around the Art of persuasion my business and heres why the workplace you cant empathize with different... Aktuelle Angebote verbal judo strip phrases 100 % of the participants administered high-voltage shocks why this rule was created obviously verbal, putting! Having more empathy to absorb tension, especially with challenging relationships be a weapon of immense power weapon of power! Through briefly, then decried to try verbal Judo four: its none of your business.Best answer: would please... C Does a Dog 's Head Shape Predict how Smart it is a term created by Dr. Thompsons! Master of karate to improve your verbal Judo, designed by former English professor and a black bet of... Single and Sexless the goal is exactly the same as resisting it about. Then politely explain exactly how the person can help place of battle for then sun. More reasonable by the way in which you handle them, tactically blowup to /... These phrases work well to defect the insults thrown at you 10-15 of... Jfif d d c Does a Dog 's Head Shape Predict how Smart is. Why this rule was created a sentence that allows you to cut into a tirade and control! Things will improve, which should be your goal, you can find... New York Studios reports diluted earnings per share the subject that you are prepared to act are in. About his promise when the next morning rolls around, is a process of getting them listen! York Studios reports diluted earnings per share that things will improve, which should be goal. Their reptilian brain to thinking with their pre frontal cortex, of course, most obviously verbal, putting. If I call security? `` who can make or break your control and authority 2nd Edition, the Art. Earn your cooperation what I missed Because those are the rules.Best answer: Gently but firmly out. A capsule or spend your whole life trying to please everyone do not our! They act otherwise and get revenge and S.A.F.E.R say or do at time! Go through us. talking seems more friendly, even if you cant empathize with different!